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Archive for the ‘Words Redefined’ Category

A Touch of Humor – Words Redefined

Posted by cotojo on February 19, 2008

Consciousness – the time between naps. Accountant – someone you hire to explain that you didn’t make the money you did.

Wedding – a funeral where you smell your own flowers.

Justice – a decision in your favor.

Paradox – two physicians.

Court of law – the place where a suit is pressed and a man can be taken to the cleaners.

Flattery – an insult in gift wrapping.

Alimony – the cost of loving.

Capitalism – the survival of the fattest.

Oboe – An ill woodwind that no-one blows good.

Impeccable – having immunity to woodpeckers.

Diplomacy –  The art of saying “nice doggy” until you can find a rock.

A consultant is a person who borrows your watch, tells you what time it is, pockets the watch, and sends you a bill for it.

A born loser –  Somebody who calls the telephone number that’s scrawled in lipstick on the phone booth wall — and his wife answers.

Related Posts:
English Language
A Play With The English Language

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