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Archive for December 3rd, 2007

I’m The Reason For Santa’s Naughty List

Posted by cotojo on December 3, 2007

My dear friend Mary Ann from maryannaville sent me this…..apparently this suits me perfectly 🙂

I'm the reason lol

Absolutely wicked hahahaha
What makes you think that I may be in a little bit of trouble 🙂

Posted in Christmas, fun, Humor | Tagged: , , , , | 12 Comments »

Santa’s New Contract For 2007

Posted by cotojo on December 3, 2007

Santa’s New Contract For 2007

A new contract for Santa has been negotiated…Please read the following carefully.

I regret to inform you that, effective immediately, I will no longer be able to serve the Southern United States on Christmas Eve. Due to the overwhelming current population of the Earth, my contract was re-negotiated by North American Fairies and Elves Local 209. I now only serve certain areas of Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Wisconsin and Michigan.

I also get longer breaks for milk and cookies, so keep that in mind. However, I am certain that your children will be in good hands with your local replacement that happens to be my third cousin, Bubba Claus. His side of the family is from the South Pole. He shares my goal of delivering toys to all good boys and girls. However, there are a few differences between us.

They are as follows:
1. There is no danger of a Grinch stealing your presents from Bubba. He has a gun rack on his sleigh and a bumper sticker that reads “This sleigh insured by Smith & Wesson”.

2. Instead of milk and cookies, Bubba Claus prefers children to leave RC cola and pork rinds (or a moon pie) on the fireplace. And Bubba doesn’t smoke a pipe. He dips a little snuff, though, so please have an empty spit can handy.

3. Bubba’s sleigh is pulled by floppy-eared, flying coon dogs instead of reindeer. I made the mistake of loaning him a couple of my reindeer one time and Blitzen’s head now overlooks Bubba’s fireplace.

4. You won’t hear “On Comet, on Cupid…” when Bubba Claus arrives. Instead you will hear “On Earnhardt, on Wallace, on Martin and Labonte. On Rudd, on Jarrett, on Elliot and Petty.”

5. “Ho, Ho, Ho!” has been replaced by “Yee Haw!” And you also are likely to hear Bubba’s elves respond “I hear’d dat!”

6. As required by Southern highway laws, Bubba Claus’ sleigh does have Yosemite Sam mud flaps with the words “Back Off”. The last I heard, it has other decorations as well. One is a Chevy logo with lights that race through the letters and the other is a caricature of me (Santa Claus) going wee-wee on the Tooth Fairy.

7. The usual Christmas movie classics such as “Miracle on 34th Street” and “It’s a Wonderful Life” will not be shown in your viewing area. Instead you will see “Ernest Saves Christmas” and “Smoky and the Bandit IV” featuring Burt Reynolds as Bubba Claus and dozens of state patrol cars crashing into each other.

8. Bubba Claus doesn’t wear a belt. If I were you, I’d make sure that you, the wife and the kids turn the other way when he bends over to put the presents under the tree.

9. Don’t look for the traditional stocking items this year either. Instead of chocolates and candy canes, children in the South can expect to find beef jerky, Vienna sausages and a can of Spam.

10. Toys will be assembled by Bubba Claus’s elves in his Freedom Homes doublewide workshop.

11. And finally, lovely Christmas songs such as Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer” and “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” will be replaced. “Bubba Shot the Jukebox” and “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer” will be played repeatedly on radio stations all over the South.

Sincerely yours, Santa Claus

Santa and Rudolph

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Posted in Christmas, fun, Humor | Tagged: , , , | 8 Comments »

Award Frenzy Strikes Again

Posted by cotojo on December 3, 2007

Over the past few weeks I have seen and received so many awards. This is awesome recognition for bloggers who build communities and participate throughout the blogosphere.

Good Buzzz Award

Brad The Blogbee, who lives at Polliwog’s Pond has been buzzing around the blogosphere with his cute smile and big button nose, giving out the “Good Buzzz Blog Award” created with the help of Mike Wheeler at Things By Mike.

According to Brad:  The Good Buzzz Blog Award is for blogs that have generated a happy hum in the blogosphere. Whether it be for their blog in general, one outstanding, unusual or controversial post, or for something cool the blogger has done. Or even for recognizing some promising, brand-new blogs.”
I have been honored with this buzzing award by Ann, author of A Nice Place In The Sun

Now, what a wonderful bee buzzing award, and I’m honored that Ann has buzzed me with this award. Thank you so much Ann 🙂
For Brads award rules, and image he has generously granted permission to use, and the code for the award visit the original post On Polliwog’s Pond.

Congratulations to the following Blogs and in words of Brad The Blogbee, keep on buzzzin’!!
Aslan of Straight Truth,  Colorado Baby of Los Dos Amigos,  AngelBaby of Your Caring Angels, Lisa from Life Is Just Around The Corner,  Michelle of My Menopausal Musings
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It's  A Major Award
  
I have received the ‘It’s a Major Award’ from Jos, author of NoDirectOn (NotNoDirection)  I consider ALL awards to be major awards and am always surprised and honored to receive them.
 Jos awarded this to this blog and my Free PC Security blog.  Thank you so much Jos 🙂
 It is with great pleasure that I pass this award on to the following bloggers:
Hanna from Amori,poesie,arte,chat virtuali by Hanna Robin from The Spirit Knows Best,  Stacie from A Developing Blogger,  Maunie from Maunie James, JesseTheCat from Jesse Blogs It All
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Best Blogging Buddies Award
  
This is an award that I created and passed on to a superb list of bloggers that DO make a difference with their blogging.
I was somewhat surprised to be awarded this by Eric, author of SpeedcatHollydale.
Eric, thank you….it is an honor and privelege to receive this award 🙂
In fairness to all I won’t pass this one on as I did award many of you with this award 🙂
I will also be adding these to my Awards Page with links back to those that honored my humble blog with these wonderful awards.  Thank you all so very much 🙂

Take some time to get to know the recipients, this is what makes the blogosphere such a wonderful global community.

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Posted in Awards | Tagged: , , , , , , | 16 Comments »